


Under stars; we are alone

by ScriptaManent



Series: Haikyuu Angst Week 2020 [2]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Day 4: Broken promises, Grief/Mourning, Haikyuu Angst Week 2020, Implied/Referenced Character Death, M/M, Stargazing, Sweet & Painful, day 4: death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-04
Updated: 2020-11-04
Packaged: 2021-03-08 22:02:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,090
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27313762
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ScriptaManent/pseuds/ScriptaManent
Summary: “We're looking directly at the past, Iwa-chan! The stars will keep the memory of an instant for the next thousands of years, until the last ray of light reaches the Earth. What's a photo compared to them?"For Haikyuu Angst Week, Day 4: Broken promises + Death
Relationships: Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru
Series: Haikyuu Angst Week 2020 [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1993792
Comments: 4
Kudos: 18
Collections: Haikyuu Angst Week 2020





	Under stars; we are alone

**Author's Note:**

> For Haikyuu Angst Week, Day 4: Broken promises + Death  
> Please mind the tags!!
> 
> Thanks for your help with the title, @MaxTheRewinder ♡

“Can you believe that so many of them are already dead, and yet their light still reaches us,” Oikawa declared, his voice soft and full of nostalgia.

It rustled in the night, bending the blades of grass around them as if the wind was carrying his voice away, a mere whisper in the quiet atmosphere. Stretched above them like a protecting blanket, the sky was darker than Oikawa had ever seen it, and yet it was dotted with many more stars than he remembered ever having seen in his life. Its unfathomable velvet drew him in, called his name, but Oikawa only had eyes for Iwaizumi by his side. 

His head comfortably settled on the other’s laps, he was gazing up at his best friend rather than at the landscape, shameless, his breath taken away. Iwaizumi stood immobile, his green eyes focused on the billions of suns burning up light-years away from them. A sad smile played on his lips and he clenched his jaws tighter.

“Hey, Oikawa,” he called, and the other adjusted his position to get a better look at his face. “You know, I think you were right. Maybe stars are better than photographs, after all.”

A grin tugged at the corners of the setter’s lips, a bit smug, he had to admit. It was rare for Iwaizumi to say Oikawa was right.

“Because through stars, the memories of the past last longer,” Oikawa completed, echoing the words he had pronounced years ago.

They were in junior high, at the time, and Iwaizumi had snorted, an ugly sound that Oikawa could still remember with precision even to this day. It was a candid memory, one he treasured dearly.

“I still have all the stupid selfies you sent me saved in my phone,” Iwaizumi spoke again, his fingers mechanically reaching for the device in his pocket.

He didn’t take it out.

“I didn’t know you liked my face so much, Iwa-chan,” Oikawa joked half-heartedly.

“I look at them every day,” Iwaizumi confided, the edge to his voice growing with each word.

He swallowed audibly and Oikawa sat up straight to face him, remaining close, never breaking contact. He reached out to smooth the frown that was settling on his friend’s face, wishing it away. With his free hand, he brushed Iwaizumi’s knuckles, but the other only averted his eyes, his eyebrows furrowing deeper in a pained expression that was all too familiar to Oikawa.

“Iwa-chan, please, don’t…” he begged, but Iwaizumi bit his bottom lip hard enough to make blood pearl.

He closed his eyes, hiding away these fragments of his soul that were so precious to Oikawa behind a mask of agony, and Oikawa felt his heart being torn off his chest.

“I thought you cared about me,” Iwaizumi continued, his words razor sharp, cutting through Oikawa’s bleeding flesh with pinpoint accuracy.

There was nothing but despair in Oikawa’s voice when he cried out.

“But I do!”

Iwaizumi’s whole body shook at once, shoving Oikawa off him, and what started as a nervous laughter ended in sobs.

“But you had to leave me behind, huh? I thought we had agreed we'd go to the Olympics together. I trusted you!”

Iwaizumi’s voice growled like a torrent, but the man in front of Oikawa had nothing aggressive in him. He was broken; the soul of a kid lost in the middle of a raging storm.

Iwaizumi brought his knees to his chest and wrapped his arms around them, concealing his expression and the tears that streamed down his face from the other.

He choked more than he breathed, and Oikawa knelt in front of him in a solemn stance.

“What the _hell_ , Oikawa, that’s not fair!” Iwaizumi yelled, his nails digging into the skin of his arms. Oikawa remained frozen. “That’s not fair!” he repeated, his voice higher than usual, broken by another desperate sob that threatened to completely take over him.

“I know, Iwa-chan. I’m sorry,” Oikawa whispered.

He moved closer so that he could wrap his arms around Iwaizumi in a tight embrace, but the other only shivered more.

“Why did you have to leave me? I feel so lonely…” he breathed out between two hiccups.

Oikawa ran a hand through his best friend’s spiky hair, its scent and its texture so familiar to him. He could remember it tickling his cheek; they were six years old, taking a nap together in the middle of the forest. He could remember ruffling it just to piss Iwaizumi off; they were fourteen and Iwaizumi had been asked out by a girl from another class. He could remember the way Iwaizumi’s hair glistened after the rain, soaked and yet never quite flat on his head; they were seventeen and thought they had all the time in the world.

His heart sank in his chest and a soft, sad smile found its way on Oikawa’s lips. Iwaizumi sniffed and furiously wiped the tears off his face. His eyes glazed over, he stared straight ahead, at something that was definitely not there.

“That’s already more like my Iwa-chan,” Oikawa praised him, and the other exhaled a long and shaky breath.

His breathing evened out and all his muscles relaxed at once, as if someone had just turned the power off.

Slowly, as if exploring a sacred sculpture, Oikawa traced Iwaizumi’s cheekbones with the pad of his thumb, his gesture tender and soothing. He placed a kiss low on his temple, and he swore he could taste the salt of his best friend’s tears on his lips. 

“Everything's so dull,” Iwaizumi declared, his voice devoid of any emotion. “It's like I died with you.”

The fingers resting lightly on the small of his back, the lips brushing his forehead, the shoulders pressing against his whenever he needed support — all ghost caresses that Iwaizumi couldn’t feel on his skin. 

“I’ll always be with you,” Oikawa whispered nonetheless. It was another promise, one that he intended to keep.

Iwaizumi turned toward him with a jolt, eyes wide and rimmed with red, and for a split second, Oikawa was certain he had heard him. He smiled and pressed another kiss on Iwaizumi’s cheek in a vain attempt at calming the stream of tears that flowed down again.

Something swelled inside Iwaizumi, bubbling up until it escaped his lips, a sound halfway between a laugh and a heartbreaking lament.

Oikawa was the brightest star shining in Iwaizumi’s dark sky, he had always been. The echo of his voice still reached Iwaizumi long after his light had faded.

**Author's Note:**

> If you look closely, there have been hints at the plot twist from the very beginning—  
> Anyway, I still have one more fic ready for angst week, but this time, it won't be Iwaoi! Brace yourselves.
> 
> [Twitter](https://twitter.com/AngstWeaver) | [Other Haikyuu fics](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ScriptaManent/works?fandom_id=758208)


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